krickets: (!SPN: Sam/Dean Kiss)
krickets ([personal profile] krickets) wrote2007-07-17 03:08 am
Entry tags:

buried in the white - supernatural - sam/dean

Title: buried in the white
Fandom, Pairing: Supernatural, Sam/Dean
Rating, Warnings: adult, wincest
Summary: Winter. Stranded. Impala. First.
Notes: My first ever wincest.



So he gives in.

That's how all this happens, anyway.

All these road nights, night roads, whatever, trickling from his cup - the one that's never quite full enough, no matter what (who) he stuffs inside its hollow.

It's winter (fucking snow) as they draw closer to some nameless town, and Sam’s warm next to him in the impala, like normal - like always. But it’s different now. Because now they’re running out of time, and that's never seemed real before.

They're stranded. (Always have been, though.)

The giving in happens in one direction or another – north or south, east or west, sideways or crooked, inside-out or backwards. It doesn't matter except for that it happens, icy wind pounding at the windows, cold leather at their backs. And as this one door opens, all the rest close, because this is the one choice that changes who Dean is, who they are.

It's not like anything ever before, and it's not slow or fast, or even really real. Because words catch inside their throats, trapped in some invisible net that filters out the truth of the thing – the thing that is them, so dark and cold, but warm when wrapped together, lunging and shoving, memories and pain, hips and flesh and scars and limbs, and then sharp grunts and they barely even got started.

So it’s finished. And after it’s done, everything else is like nails on a chalkboard, screaming their disgrace.

They’re no longer a part of this place that they protect - out there buried in the white.

Sun comes again, and they dig out the impala, dust off their weapons, shiny and sharp, and all those still-trapped words are swallowed down and kept, like treasures or secrets or both, and off they go to save another life, another soul, another town, in this very world where they don’t belong.
-fin

[identity profile] iamnotkris.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 08:12 am (UTC)(link)
Oh. Oh. This was just gorgeous. I'm going to steal it and elope with it and we'll get married off the coast of Hawaii, yes we are.

You make me want to throw in the towel when it comes to writing fic, honestly. Just when I think I'm getting somewhere. -sigh-

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 08:29 am (UTC)(link)
Oh no way! Don't even say that! I don't even know where this came from. I've been kind of jonesing to write some Wincest for a while. It's not something I think I'll do often though. But I just kinda had to get it out, and this is what emerged. I'm glad you liked it! But don't you dare throw in that towel!

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[identity profile] zelda-zee.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 08:17 am (UTC)(link)
This was amazing and beautiful and terribly sad. I love it so much, in particular the idea that their actions cut them off from the rest of the world and make it so they don't belong in it any longer. A painful fic, but brilliant.

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 08:33 am (UTC)(link)
Wow thank you sweetie! I've really been wanting to write some Wincest for a while. What strikes me about it, is just how isolating (I feel) it would be. These boys are already isolated of course, because of what they do and who they are. But this is just one more step in that direction. And so I kind of wanted to show that with my imagery here. So yeah! I'm glad you liked that theme, because that was what I was trying to get at.

[identity profile] tattoo-kink.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 08:20 am (UTC)(link)
Awww, that was gorgeous. Usually I'm not a friend of stories without dialog - but this little piece was so powerful. It warmed my heart.

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 08:35 am (UTC)(link)
Well thank you so much! I'm glad you were able to appreciate it despite there not being any dialogue! *claps* Really appreciate the fb! :D

[identity profile] zombean.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:01 am (UTC)(link)
Your first ever Wincest? Seriously? You've got Dean down to a tee - call Kripke, you should totally be writing for Supernatural. Except that maybe not all the viewers would appreciate a SamnDean that celebrate a good hunt by sucking face on the hood of the Impala. Lord knows I would trhough...*fans self*

Anyway, besides getting the characterisation pitch perfect, this ficlet has some gorgeous imagery that I rhink promotes it from a mere 'ficlet' to a bonafide 'piece'. And because even commenters should show and not tell, these are my fav lines:

"And as this one door opens, all the rest close, because this is the one choice that changes who Dean is, who they are."
- this was wicked, made me think of the awesomeness of the door that was opened, but then sucker punched me by slamming shut all the other things they were.

"So it’s finished. And after it’s done, everything else is like nails on a chalkboard, screaming their disgrace."
- simultaneously the best and worst simile ever. Best, because it creatres a really vivid image for the reader; and worst, because that image happens to be butt-ass-nasty-cakes.

"They’re no longer a part of this place that they protect - out there buried in the white."
- this line made me sad, but then totally happy with it's awesomeness. It shows the gravity of what they've done, and the "buried in the white" made me think that the white/snow signified innocence, or maybe ignorance, that the world was buried under, that they can't really be part of that world - they've seen too much and are too tainted by it.

Whoo...sorry, that was long, and a bit freshman-creative-writing-course. I guess the moral of the story here is that you are made of fantastic, both for your kick-ass writing abilities, and for being a top-notch purveyor *cough-pimp-cough* of our lovely Wincest. *g*

[identity profile] runedgirl.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 12:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes!!! What she said!

Spare and poetic and hauntingly beautiful.

Lynsey

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[identity profile] gigglemonster.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 12:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Alright, so, the most gorgeous Wincest fic I've ever read, by far!
Such amazing, beautiful imagery! It's just so poetic and graceful and flowy! There's just so much that is being said and being captured, but with so little words, and it's done SO perfectly.
I love the line about the fact that now time is running out, that that's something they never had to worry about before.
I agree, I totally love the fact this is just one more thing they do that separates them and isolates them, keeps them from being a part of the rest of the world.
And this line

So it’s finished. And after it’s done, everything else is like nails on a chalkboard, screaming their disgrace

OMG! Love it! Hurts but it's so true and so them and so wonderful.
I know that there's more I could and should be saying, but I think it might have to wait until an e-mail later, when it's not so early in the morning! :)
But, in short, I have a new favorite Sam/Dean fic.

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 02:35 pm (UTC)(link)
Aw what? Noooo... you have to say that cause you're my wife. Hahahaha.

I want to rescue you today. We'd go see Transformers and drool over Shia and Josh. It'd be beautiful.

*squishes*

[identity profile] ckll.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 12:23 pm (UTC)(link)
VERY good.

And after it’s done, everything else is like nails on a chalkboard, screaming their disgrace.

(claps)
Keep up :D

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 02:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks sweetie! :D

[identity profile] workswithwords.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 12:35 pm (UTC)(link)
*flails like a mad woman*

SO GOOD.The imagery is breathtaking and the pain that Dean has in this is so perfect it hurts like hell!

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 02:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Well look who crawled out of her batcave to come and read the wincest! Hehehhe!


*squishes you*

ILU!

♥!
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[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:19 pm (UTC)(link)
Aw thank you! ♥!

[identity profile] slybrunette.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 03:12 pm (UTC)(link)
You have to be kidding me? This is your first? Cause it sure as hell doesn't look like it. You've got the characterization perfect, and the way you wrote this without any dialogue works in the way that only you could make it work.

It's not like anything ever before, and it's not slow or fast, or even really real. Because words catch inside their throats, trapped in some invisible net that filters out the truth of the thing – the thing that is them, so dark and cold, but warm when wrapped together, lunging and shoving, memories and pain, hips and flesh and scars and limbs, and then sharp grunts and they barely even got started.

*dies* because you rock, and this rocks. (and forgive the lack of Supernatural icons)

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Hahaha. Don't die! *breaks out the first aid kit*

I got neosporin!

(PS - I ILU! Thank you!)

[identity profile] gottalovev.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 03:55 pm (UTC)(link)
wow! I love being flabergasted in so little words. very raw and powerful, I love it! I see a great future in Wincest *nods*

this is beautiful but oh so sad. so very them. *sigh*

great job! I'm totally saving this.

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:27 pm (UTC)(link)
And I love flabbergasting you...

Wow... that sounds dirty. Heh.

[identity profile] philomel.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 04:45 pm (UTC)(link)
This has such aching beauty. Fluid and poetic. Lovely. :)

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you so much! :D

[identity profile] lima-sierra.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 05:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Loved this! What a great job you did for your first wincest. I hope it's not that last wincest you write because it rocked. *g*

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you so much. I was definitely nervous posting my first wincest! I dunno if it'll be the last. I hope not!

:D

[identity profile] fondillusions.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 05:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh girl, you're evil... in the best way of course... 'cause you know, I love you.

This is so bittersweet. I love how you distinguished that they've entered uncharted territory by making them return to everyday's life instantly after what they've done. Not speaking about such things hurts more than yelling at one another, so yeah, this left me with a sad feeling. Beautiful. :)

*hugs* :)

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I am evil, aren't I? Haha.

Aw. I don't mean to make you sad!

Wait, I'm evil. Nevermind. I so totally do mean to make you sad! Bwuahahahhaha!
athenejen: iAthena (Default)

[personal profile] athenejen 2007-07-17 06:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Shiny and sharp, indeed.

trapped in some invisible net that filters out the truth of the thing – the thing that is them, so dark and cold

Just... yes. It's refreshing to see a grittier take on Wincest, one that carries with it the almost-claustrophobic difficulties of this past season.

This is dark-hearted, gorgeous gem of a piece, sharp-edged as a crystal shard and beautiful in its unflinching poetry.

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Speaking of poetry! I think that's the most flattering and eloquent feedback I've ever gotten!

*cherishes*

[identity profile] totaled.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 06:44 pm (UTC)(link)
ohhhhhhhhmygod. when it said adult, I was ready for..y'know, pr0n. But! this was so much better. I love it. I love it LOTZ.

*memories*

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Oi! Well I'm glad it was better, didn't mean to mislead. I just had no idea what to rate it as! But I'm super stoked you liked it! Yay for memories! I'm flattered!

[identity profile] gregoria44.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 07:03 pm (UTC)(link)
How DO you fit so much into so few words?

Oh yes, I remember, you're super, that's how!

*loves you, as ever*

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee! Love your icon!

And I just... DON'T KNOW. I think every story starts with a lot more in my head - there's miles and lifetimes, and then I just cut it down - get straight to the point. Hahaha.

*loves you right back*!

[identity profile] fiery-fox2.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 07:19 pm (UTC)(link)
Okay..."buried in the white" is officially going in my "memories" list...*squees*...IMPALA!PORN!! WHEEE!!! Yeah...er....*calms self down*

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Hahahaha I have to say I love your enthusiasm. And you'll get that muse working, yet, I'm sure! *wink*
ext_16765: (Winchesters WIN)

[identity profile] arabella-hope.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 10:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Theis gorgeous - such flow to it and so abstract. Gah, I adore it love!

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 01:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks ang! :D I'm seriously glad you liked it! :D

[identity profile] downbythebay-4.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 11:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Absolutely beautiful through and through.

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 01:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Well thank you for saying so. :D

[identity profile] lbmisscharlie.livejournal.com 2007-07-17 11:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh man, this is just amazing, and beautiful, and I don't even know. Just, wow. This line: They're stranded. (Always have been, though.) and the very last line really, really got to me somehow. Beautifully done and I would love to see some more wincest from you!

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 01:16 pm (UTC)(link)
♥! Thank you so much. I'm glad you picked out that line, I was a little wary of it I don't know why. Anyway thank you! We'll see about more Wincest. I don't always plan these things through. Hahaha. Perhaps.

[identity profile] supernation.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 12:12 am (UTC)(link)
Beautiful, poetic, full of lovely and angsty images, and I just love that you wrote this.

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 01:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Aw! TY! ♥!

[identity profile] stare-at-walls.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 08:03 am (UTC)(link)
Oh. OMG. This si just so evocative and so SAD but real. We all know that the emotion here is real (fine, The wincest is arguable) but you've just captured so much EMOTION AND STUFF here hon, that I am in utter AWE.

Awesome Job. :D ♥ Favorited, yes?

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 01:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee! Emotion and stuff is just what I was going for! Thank you! And thanks for favoriting. That's a serious compliment. *squishes you!*

[identity profile] snookscribbles.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 09:34 am (UTC)(link)
Beautiful, absolutely beautiful!

Incest as a sign of Sam and Dean's difference from normal society is a common trope in Supernatural fanfic, but the quiet lyricism of your prose turned what is usually the writer's justification into a poignant result of the sacrifices they've made to protect others.

I'm awed.

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 01:25 pm (UTC)(link)
*blush* Wow, this is how I want to wake up. Definitely made my morning that's for sure. Thank you so much for saying such nice things!

[identity profile] impala-chick.livejournal.com 2007-07-18 11:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh boys! Loved how this felt so raw and in the moment, like even if the boys try to bury it they never can.

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-19 02:43 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you! :D
sylvanwitch: (Default)

[personal profile] sylvanwitch 2007-07-19 03:07 am (UTC)(link)
Spare, imagistic, taut, hot...wonderful! Bravo! *claps wildly*

[identity profile] crickets.livejournal.com 2007-07-19 03:17 am (UTC)(link)
*bows* Hehehe. Thank you! You all flatter me so very much!

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