i'm talking to the man in the mirror

[krickets]

Ten years too late.

I came into work this morning and a realization hit me: Someone had stolen five out of six newspapers that are delivered to the library.

Who wakes up in the morning thinking: "Hallelujah, Bin Laden is dead! I think I'll celebrate by swiping a bunch of newspapers from the library?" Really? That's just sad. [And they probably would have taken all six if one of our spares wasn't always inexplicably put in the wrong spot.]

But this is not the first revelation I had this morning. Although, it is still pretty early so there could be more to come. The first revelation I had was when I was walking in the grass (which no one ever does save for me; isn't that what grass was made for?) and I thought: I don't feel any better.


Ten years.

The landscape (politically and economically) of this country has completely changed over these last ten years. A lot of people have died, not just in the attacks, but afterward. In Afghanistan and Iraq and here at home. Some quick. Some slow, like the firemen and other rescue workers who have quietly been dying due to the toxic dust they inhaled during the rescue effort. And the real crime there is not that they got sick, but how our country, the good old US of A, has treated them since they've gotten sick. The US has spent billions (with a B! And possibly a T?) of dollars on war efforts and who knows what else. And, though I hate to use a catch phrase, the country has been deeply polarized in a way that feels, to me, irreparable.

I came of age during the tail end of the Clinton administration and then grew into the adult I am today during a time when everything that I stood for was considered an affront to patriotism and something to be ashamed of. You'd think some of that would have died down by now, but just last year one of the most talked about news stories was the "it's-not-a-Mosque-it's-a-community-center" that was to be built at/by/near/close-to/in-the-same-city-as ground zero. People were pissed. And if you weren't, well then you just weren't a "true American," you know? And this year, the fury over President Obama's birth certificate was at its loudest -- despite the fact that the state of Hawaii had already verified his birth back in October of 2008.

And so, given all that, maybe it's just me, but the death of one man hardly seems worth it.

In a way there is relief. The question of where he is and if he'll ever be caught has finally been answered. But at the same time, he'll never truly pay for his crimes. For the past ten years, his punishment has only been to watch the worst being brought out in our country. Which was exactly his point. We weren't just crippled on that one day. We have been crippled ever since, and will continue to be crippled. And the man never even had to sit trial.

And even if he had, one man's death (or one man's prosecution) is not going to make all of these problems go away. These world-wide problems, terrorism and evil people doing evil things? Not going away. And it's not going to erase that last ten years and the crimes that we have committed against each other and others. (War, racism, religious discrimination, and yes, even political discrimination.) And the troops are still not all home.

I think it's okay to be relieved, to feel pride, to be happy. I would have loved to have been there to hear them saying the pledge outside of the White House last night. But I have a bit of a knee-jerk reaction when I see people dancing in the streets over what is essentially an act of war, no matter how justified that act may be. I remember feeling the (fear-fueled) solidarity that came after the attacks, as I'm sure many others in the US do. But I also remember how that sense of patriotism can be skewed into something not so pleasant.

I re-tweeted the lovely Emma Caulfield last night, some silly thing about Obama's hail mary pass. But I later deleted it because I didn't like what she said about kicking ass. I don't think she meant it in the same way Toby Keith talks about putting boots in people's asses, but I just didn't like the way it sounded. I don't subscribe to that Toby Keith type of mentality, and even though very few people actually read my twitter, I don't want anyone to assume that I do.

So essentially, this is just me rambling. Sure we had a small, but late-coming, victory last night. And hopefully our country and everyone who needs it gets the closure that has long been sought. But as the late great MJ said, if you want to make the world a better place, you have to take a look at yourself.

Just FYI, I have many reservations about posting this, because whenever I talk politics I always look back on it and feel like I could have said whatever I was thinking in about a thousand different (and better) ways and also later feel like I've left tons of stuff out, but whatever, I'm going for it this time.

Comments

[gregoria44.livejournal.com]

I hear you, my dear.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I do not begrudge anybody who is happy about it. But these are my own personal thoughts on the matter. I just hope we don't see this as a solution, because there is so much more that needs fixing.

[hepburnesque.livejournal.com]

I came of age during the tail end of the Clinton administration and then grew into the adult I am today during a time when everything that I stood for was considered an affront to patriotism and something to be ashamed of. You'd think some of that would have died down by now, but just last year one of the most talked about news stories was the "it's-not-a-Mosque-it's-a-community-center" that was to be built at/by/near/close-to/in-the-same-city-as ground zero. People were pissed. And if you weren't, well then you just weren't a "true American," you know? And this year, the fury over President Obama's birth certificate was at its loudest -- despite the fact that the state of Hawaii had already verified his birth back in October of 2008.

Same here.

I can't believe what people get so worked up over when there's so much going wrong in the U.S.

In 2009, 43.6 million people were in poverty, up from 39.8 million in 2008 — the third consecutive annual increase in the number of people in poverty. (http://www.census.gov/hhes/www/poverty/data/incpovhlth/2009/highlights.html)

The USDA report showed that nearly 50 million people, 16 percent of Americans, went hungry or were at risk of going hungry last year, compared with 12 percent in 2007.

The study also found that in 2008, 17 million children - 4 million more than in 2007 - lacked sufficient food. That number is roughly equivalent to 1 in 4 children going hungry. (http://articles.sfgate.com/2009-11-18/news/17181055_1_nutrition-programs-san-francisco-food-bank-dairy-products)

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Yes these are all major problems. Those statistics SUCK if I do say so myself.

However, I do think that this news is good news overall, but it's not a magic bullet that's going to fix everything. (no pun intended.)

[zelda-zee.livejournal.com]

You articulated my feelings much better than I could have. I do feel a certain sense of relief, but I don't feel like celebrating. Ultimately, while symbolically significant, it's a single man's death and it probably won't result on a decrease in global terrorism. Just the opposite, I suspect, at least in the short term.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Yeah I agree, it's more symbolic than anything else. As the president has said "justice" has been done, and based on the finality of death, that's true to some extent. But there can never be true justice for the way that one act, pardon my french, has truly fucked with our country.

[mistojen.livejournal.com]

All I can say is: THIS. You've said things that I'm feeling without me realizing fully what I was feeling. I came of age around the same time. I lived in New York and had friends in the city; family working for the President on 9/11. And yet, I still keep coming back to this:

And so, given all that, maybe it's just me, but the death of one man hardly seems worth it. and But I have a bit of a knee-jerk reaction when I see people dancing in the streets over what is essentially an act of war, no matter how justified that act may be.

And basically, I think it boils down to me just feeling really uncomfortable in general. Thank you for this.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

There is something slightly uncomfortable about it. Last night I was talking to Dayl and told her it would be sort of cool to be there (This is before I woke up and saw how huge the crowd got) but that I wouldn't know how I really felt about it. Definitely a little awkward.

Thank you. :)

[caffeinified.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I rarely talk politics on LJ cause I never feel like I say everything the right way and people get so worked up over things. But I do find it hard to go yay someone else is dead. It's a mixture of emotions that I can't quite put into words. I wish I were more articulate, like Maya Angelou or someone of the like.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

You can always just quote people:
"I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy." - Martin Luther King, Jr

[illuminaris.livejournal.com]

One of my good friends posted the full quote on Facebook this morning and it really hit me hard.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Could you copy & paste here?

[illuminaris.livejournal.com]

Sure!

--------------------------------------

‎"I will mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that." - Martin Luther King Jr

[mistojen.livejournal.com]

Butting in to let you know I'm ganking this for my FB, cuz...yeah. Perfect quote.

[illuminaris.livejournal.com]

Np!

Whoops!

[crickets.livejournal.com]

http://blasphemes.blogspot.com/2011/05/misquote-jr.html

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Unfortunately that was not a real MLK quote. Just something everyone on twitter/facebook was posting: http://blasphemes.blogspot.com/2011/05/misquote-jr.html

[mistojen.livejournal.com]

Actually, according to the comments, most of it really is MLK...just the first sentence isn't, which is interesting, I think. Huh.

The more you know lol

[mistojen.livejournal.com]

(*misses being able to edit comments*) ETA: given, it's paraphrased, but still.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I totally forgot that was a paid feature. Omg I would die if I couldn't edit comments. And you can quote me!

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah the while darkness and light and love thing that's definitely him.

[illuminaris.livejournal.com]

Thanks for writing this. I'm on the same page as you are, especially in terms of the chanting, guiling, bullying, belligerent behavior in light of Osama's death. There is a sense of relief, but there's something... off about celebrating this. For a lot of people this seems to be closure for September 11th, and I don't entirely subscribe to thinking about the death of one person in the same way, other than as a symbolic figure.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I haven't really seen too much of the media coverage so I definitely didn't see it turn into that, but I could so easily see how it could. And that does scare me a bit.

[illuminaris.livejournal.com]

Yeah... I've been watching the news all last night/today, so I've just been subjected to a lot of it, I think.

[in48frames.livejournal.com]

Word to everything you said. I feel like unfortunately a lot of the celebrities with huge audiences on Twitter were offering the shallow "Fuck yeah America!" and not suggesting that people should think harder about this.

I loved Obama's speech, though. I feel like, regardless of anything else, he has SUCH a level head on his shoulders and that can only benefit the US at times like these.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I don't know about the majority of the celeb tweeps, but a lot of "my" celebrities were mum on the topic as a whole. There were only one or two FYEAHs in the crowd. Some of them had some more sobering things to say. And Matt Davis, though he finally got around to an agreeable point, started the night by calling everyone "droids" and bashing the pres. Lovely.