we're never going back home again, lost, sawyer/claire, pg

[krickets]

title: we're never going back home again
fandom, pairing, rating, word count: lost, slight sawyer/claire, pg, 380
summary: post s4, sawyer finds a new purpose
notes: written for purestvixen for lostsquee who requested sawyer. enjoy sweetie! thank you to kmousie for the beta!


By the time Daniel and the others on the zodiac arrive back at the beach, the entire camp is already looking to Sawyer to point the way. He feels strong that day, his body humming with adrenaline and life and purpose.

He can do this.

-

Sawyer thinks best when the sun is highest in the sky. Everything is somehow clearer, no question who he is, his feet planted firmly on the ground. Sand gets washed away, structures go up, and everybody finds their place.

By the light of day, it doesn’t feel like that missed rescue was the end of them at all. It feels like maybe it was the beginning.

-

In the dark, the façade of their non-existence comes plainly into view. They are no one, and nowhere, forgotten and gone, no more discernable on a map than the edge of the ocean and the sand, storm clouds blotting out the moon’s silver rays. (But they're still here.)

He sits alone at night and questions things, wonders if he made the right choice, if there’s a way to take it back somehow.

“Don’t even think about it, James,” Rose says to him one night after dinner. “These people need you.”

-

Claire stumbles onto the beach one afternoon. She’s hungry and her feet are sore, but her hair smells like coconut shampoo, and Juliet tells Sawyer that there isn’t a single scratch anywhere on her, that she’s probably healthier than all the rest of them.

“Been looking for you, Mamacita,” Sawyer whispers next to her in the tent, after she’s eaten and can no longer stay awake.

She yawns and runs a hand through his hair. “I know,” she says.

Sawyer avoids mentioning Aaron. The time will come for that, and this isn’t it. But Claire doesn’t even ask – like she knows somehow, like maybe she’s okay with it all.

She ignores his questions of where she’s been, only tells him that she remembers feeling at peace, tells him that everything is going to be okay. “There’s nothing in the dark to be afraid of, Sawyer,” she says before closing her eyes. “Nothing at all.”

He sleeps next to her that night, close enough to feel the heat from her skin, afraid she’ll disappear again. But somehow, he knows she won’t.

-fin.

Comments

[siluria]

This is really sweet, I love the fact that Sawyer takes over and Rose is there to make sure he doesn't give in. Claire's return is really very well written too, very nice :)

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Aw thank you. You're too sweet!

And you helped me out! When I came to read your comment and scrolled down I was like "okay why is this line in here twice?" Whoops.

Anyway, thanks so much for reading and reviewing. ;)

[siluria]

Always happy to help... especially when I don't actually do anything ;)

[elliotsmelliot.livejournal.com]

I feel like Hurley's scheme way back in season 3 is all leading to what you wrote. I know he can do this. He has great experience as one of the forgotten people. The way you described this was just beautiful.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I actually thought about that ep as I wrote this. Thank you so much for the awesome feedback babe! I'm glad you enjoyed it! :D

[navras-rheya.livejournal.com]

I really love this because you pretty much made Sawyer what I want him to be this coming season. Really great fic.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I want him to, too! ;) Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review. ♥!

[demonqueen666.livejournal.com]

Everything is somehow clearer, no question who he is, his feet planted firmly on the ground.

I love the idea of Sawyer coming into his own and taking charge, and you captured the emotion of that scenario perfectly in so few words. And the little bit with Claire returning at the very end brought some unexpected sweetness :)

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I am pretty excited about that myself. I have no doubt it will happen. Though I have my worries about Claire. Last time someone disappeared at the end of a season (WALT) he was gone practically the whole season!

Thank you for the very kind feedback, babe! :)

[gottalovev.livejournal.com]

I cannot tell you how I wish Sawyer will take the lead on the island next season. he can do it, i am so sure of that. and Claire coming back... confused but still her... I loved it.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

*beams* Me too! Oh, Sawyer.

Thank you, hon!

[gigglemonster.livejournal.com]

*happy sigh*
this is so awesome
you always write sawyer so perfectly and i love him stepping up and being in charge in this. plus, rose, awesome :)
those last few paragraphs with claire are beautiful and sweet and i love it!
♥

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Aw, thanks Dayl. I'm glad you think so! Rose really is awesome! Hehehe.

Thank you. ;)

[inthekeyofd.livejournal.com]

OH OH!! Sawyer is their leader now and you know, he's PERFECT for it, he's really become James now, there's still a hint of Sawyer, but James has really come out, I was saying to someone that the island really tears them apart and puts them back together as the people they should be, Jack is exactly what he was and hid and Sawyer is exactly what he always could have been..James.

I love that he's so protective of the women on that island, I think it comes from his background, but I think part of it is what he did for a living, taking advantage of them, and now he can really make amends.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I agree, and I think he already has in a way. Just jumping off that helicopter alone. And thank you so much for reading and reviewing! :D I'm glad you liked it!

[cynthia-arrow.livejournal.com]

Lovely writing, darling. Evocative.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Thanks, babe! :D

[eponine119.livejournal.com]

I love this! This line is so perfect, somehow:

“Don’t even think about it, James,” Rose says to him one night after dinner. “These people need you.”

And I love that last section, where Claire comes back, healthy and just randomly yawning like she's been off somewhere asleep.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Rose only speaks the truth. ;)

Thank you so much, hon! I'm really happy you liked it. ♥!

[daybreak777.livejournal.com]

Oh, that was wonderful. I just prompted someone, anyone really, to write Sawyer/Claire in a porn battle a friend's hosting. And then to find this!

I like that this was subtle and quiet and that without the rest, Sawyer finds a way to come into his own. my favorite line:

“Been looking for you, Mamacita,” Sawyer whispers next to her in the tent, after she’s eaten and can no longer stay awake.

There's something sweet and romantic and kind of hot about that line. Hey, when your muse comes back, it comes back in style!

Thanks for sharing this.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Aw, well I'm glad I could give you what you wanted without even being asked. Well kinda, there's no porn. Hahaha. (But I have written some of that in the past...)

Thank you!!! ♥

[slybrunette.livejournal.com]

I'm kind of hoping that Sawyer winds up in charge after all of this, so this got points immediately. And Rose telling him not to even think about it is so in character for her.

She ignores his questions of where she’s been, only tells him that she remembers feeling at peace, tells him that everything is going to be okay. “There’s nothing in the dark to be afraid of, Sawyer,” she says before closing her eyes. “Nothing at all.”

That's kind of creepy almost. It's meant to be comforting but it's almost kind of not. Yet it's like she's had her eyes opened to the island which is kind of cool.

Awesome fic hun! I'm so glad to see you back at it again :)

[crickets.livejournal.com]

*beams*

Yay! I'm glad you liked it so much. And you know what? I kinda thought the line was creepy in hindsight as well. It wasn't really meant to come off that way, no horror stories here.... yet?

Thank you ♥!

[astra2104.livejournal.com]

This is lovely, and it makes me feel all hopeful towards season 5... which is good :)

Plus Sawyer is just adorable when he's with Claire.

*snuggles fic and you*

[crickets.livejournal.com]

He really is, isn't he? Yay for hope for season 5! I'm glad I could give that to you! (And hey, there's always fic!)

*hugs*

[lenina20.livejournal.com]

oooooooooh - this is so sweet, so full of love and hope and I absolutely loved it. This is the Sawyer S5 will need, and we can only pray for some kind of connection with Claire, as beautiful as this one. Thanks a lot for sharing this. It was gorgeous!

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I certainly hope so too. Thank you, hon! :D

[mrslinus17.livejournal.com]

Really nice! I can imagine this happening on the show.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Thannk you! And so sorry this reply is so late! I have no idea how I missed this!

[bebitched.livejournal.com]

You know, I never really thought about the fact that sawyer is probably going to be the leader of the group that got left behind until I read this, but I like that.

This was very well done. I love the images you created, the comment about coconut shampoo because it makes it real somehow. Great work!

[crickets.livejournal.com]

I like that idea too. I can't wait to see it. (But who knows with this show!)

Thank you so much! I'm sorry it's taken me so long to get back to you!

[hendercats.livejournal.com]

"There's nothing in the dark to be afraid of, Sawyer," she says before closing her eyes. "Nothing at all."
Great line - so very Lost - love it.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Creepy and losty. Hehe.

Thanks so much.

Sorry it's taken so long to reply to this. I don't know how I missed it.

[zelda-zee.livejournal.com]

Love this! I love that Claire is going to make Sawyer safe in the dark. :) And how much do I love Rose? A lot, that's how much. And Sawyer being their leader, believing he can do it? Hell, yeah. That's what I want to see! Wonderful fic!

[crickets.livejournal.com]

TY! ;D

[alemyrddin.livejournal.com]

I loved how you wrote the relationship between Sawyer and Claire, it's always a bit mysterious, and I liked his protectiveness towards her.
I loved the beginning, with Sawyer taking up the leadership and the contrast between day and night.

This part, in particular:
Sawyer thinks best when the sun is highest in the sky. Everything is somehow clearer, no question who he is, his feet planted firmly on the ground.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Wow! Hi! Sorry I didn't see this comment before now.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review! :D

[alliecat8.livejournal.com]

When I'm late, I'm reallyreally late, but I'm *finally* here to read and tell you how much I liked this. I've always wondered if Sawyer sees in Claire traces of his mother, who needed protection that she never got. I wonder if S5 Sawyer will beat himself up for failing to "save" her. In this, though, you've shown us Claire trying to save Sawyer, and this line gave me chills, “There’s nothing in the dark to be afraid of, Sawyer,” she says before closing her eyes. “Nothing at all.” I hope someday he'll figure out a way to believe her.

Nice job!

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Aw, me too! I am kind of excited about season five in a sense because of the possibilities there but I'm also kind of nervous about all the millions of different ways they can mess it up! Haha.

Thank you for the comment! I love late comments! *grin*

[toestastegood.livejournal.com]

I don't ordinarily read Sawyer/Claire (I'm too busy shipping Sawyer and Charlie!), but I really liked the peaceful sense of the scene between them here. It was really very sweet. I loved Rose's cameo as well. If I was on the island, I think I'd definitely want her to be one of the leaders!

Claire's really awesome here: the way she's acting really makes you want to find out what's happened to her out there, stumbling out of the jungle unharmed. The mention of her hair smelling of shampoo is a really good touch. Whatever happened to her, she's been taken care of. The way that she's somehow just okay with Aaron being gone is a little bit creepy, because... well... she's Claire! I'd actually be really interested to see Claire without the baby. From the second we saw her, her pregnancy or her baby has always been all of her storyline. It'd be cool to see what she's like without that.

This was really creepy-but-cute! I enjoyed it - so I'm glad the lostsquee feedback challenge gave me a chance to come back and find it seeing as I must have missed it when it was first posted.

[crickets.livejournal.com]

Haha, creepy-but-cute. I think that's probably the most unique compliment I've ever gotten on a fic! Thank you so much for reading this and taking the time to leave such wonderful feedback! Much appreciated! And I'm glad you liked! :)